Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Here and Now

I went to the grocery in the wrong part of town last night. Half-way through produce I left my buggy and hurried out, putting into practice every personal defense strategy I knew...making eye contact, being very aware of my surroundings, etc. I've never been so glad to be in my car with the doors locked and the engine cranked. Live and learn.

Want to know how to make friends in a new church? Get in a fight Saturday night...go to sleep (out of pure exhaustion) without resolving said fight. Find yourself in church with this horrible nagging at your heart-only to remember the ugly, sinful way you acted the night before...post church, pre-Sunday school, attempt to settle said fight...only to continue bickering. Then go sit down together in the middle of the combined Sunday school class and try to hash it out while you act like everything's all good. It was all I could do not to burst into tears. We sat alone. I wonder why? Didn't resolve things until we were home. It was awful. We so do not have it together.

I spent an hour last night with my new neighbor. She told me all about her sweet husband who passed away thirteen years ago. She got teary, I cried. I was there over an hour. The Engineer panicked. He said I was gone so long he "forgot" where I'd gone.

The house is almost unpacked...I lack the master bedroom and the library/den, plus a massive haul up to the attic.

We'd hoped to replace our baby blue counters with something new. But, necessity calls in the form of a termite bond, plumbing, and roof work-and the counters, though swollen with water damage and seams that are peeling apart, still function. So smurf blue countertops it is! Embrace the love, baby.

Enjoy some randomness that is the here and now.


  1. Oh woman. Teary-eyed as I read this! Thank you for sharing some struggles... Sitting at work praying for yall! -Ruth

  2. Hang in there- I promise... PROMISE it will get better.

  3. Timing is everything, even in a blog post; I chuckled at the sequence of the photos. Forgive me, as a mother to boys, I saw the humor. Posting anonymously.

  4. When we are tired and stressed we can ugly fights as well...and they always seem to be on Saturday or Sunday morning. When you have small children, you blow things off to talk about it later so as to not fight in front of them...but, then you forget to talk about it and it just builds and builds. Then, there is the ugly fight. And I hate it. You are not alone. None of us have it together. We're all just trying to do the best we can living in this fallen skin. Thank God for grace.

  5. Stress, stress, stress. Hoping it will settle down a bit soon and that you will both have forgiving spirits.

  6. J-I just want you to know how excited I am for you and the rest of the fan on your new adventure. I am praying for you, my dear friend. This season will be exhausting, stressful, anxiety filled, but also new, exciting, refreshing. I love and miss you more than I can put into words. You are an exceptional wife, mother, and friend..one fight doesn't change that. Keep fighting the good fight.


  7. that wold be fam :) autocorrect gets my every time!

  8. Hang in there Jennifer! I am praying for you....

    Camille xo

  9. So good to know the post-move chaos is only temporary. Praying for your transition now. Love the updates!