Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Homesick

I'm a bit homesick. Everyone here has been so precious and so sweet. We are so richly blessed! And yet, my heart longs to be home...our old home. I long to walk up the front walk, sweaty and panting from a good run, to enjoy the spatter of cool droplets as I water our plants. I miss our little boxwood balls...and swinging on the patio...the sound of our neighbor's diesel cranking up...running next door for creamer. I miss watching the children on their swing set...and always having friends over playing...and the colors in our home...the stripes on the ceiling and the lattice on the dining room walls. I miss familiarity. And being known. And knowing.

Mother's Day was hard. A few friends remembered our baby and said something. I appreciated that so much. There was a newborn fussing a few chairs over that Sunday morning...and the girl in front of me was a week away from her due date. Sometimes it's hard to give thanks when it hurts so bad.

I recently heard a pastor say that if we knew the alternative to God's will, we would choose His will EVERY time. That's hard to fathom, and I know it's true.

Little Man had a violent throw up bug Monday night...like... he got three baths and we had to change his sheets five times. He was so sick.

I thought the rest of us had evaded it. And then we went to story time at the library. Little Bit didn't seem herself, but she'd also gotten up at 5:45 this morning, so I chalked it up to being exhausted. And then she threw up in the front yard of the library...and again on the way home and then she passed out from the exhaustion of it all. She's like a little rag doll. And she keeps saying, "I'm hungee mama. I'm hungee." Poor baby.

Sorry to be such a downer...just where I am right now. I know it'll get better. :)

PS Sister is down with the bug.

9 comments:

  1. i love your blog more than anyone's. it is beautiful, and raw, and honest. it makes me want to be myself. it makes me pray for you. hugs.

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  2. So sorry you're down, J. Really sorry. I know how hard it can be to be in a new place. I just prayed for y'all. Much love!

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  3. I am so very sorry y'all are experiencing homesickness and bug sickness. Praying encouragement and joy over you right now, friend!

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  4. Praying for you my sweet friend. Hang in there...the LORD walks this path WITH you!!

    Much Love,
    Camille XO

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  5. Just when you thought nothing more could be piled on your plate... Hang in there.

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  6. Hey friend! Just thinking of you this morning and wanting you to know that I was praying for you last night - just came to mind! I know these times are rough, and you are doing such a great job with everything you have. Hang in there. God is faithful to provide in even the small things...much love!

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  7. Remember - there are people all over the country praying for you. It takes time for any house to become a home. You and the house are just getting used to each other right now. Soon you will be part of its story, and it will be your home, and a part of yours.

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  8. It hurts deep to be soooo homesick, been there! It will pass and your new home will be home before too long. We miss you all SO much! Hope everyone feels better real soon, that is one pitiful pic of MC.

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  9. Oh friend... I can only half way fathom your homesickness as I share the same thoughts so often but have the hope of knowing that we'll be returning... eventually. Your grief on Mother's Day, I can't fathom and I will continue to pray for you. I love & miss you friend and think of you often!!!! xoxo

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