Well, Hello!

Hi. How are you? (smile)

We've had a little bit going on around here…you know…having a baby and stuff. And the ol' blog has obviously taken a backseat. But hey - we're finished with school until January and the children and I have spent the day in pajamas. We ate cookies for breakfast and are having a laid back kind of day in the very best of ways. There are legos EVERYWHERE. And ponies.

My precious baby girl is napping and wonder of wonders…I have a few minutes. And I want to spend them here. And my thoughts are so random and so streams of consciousness...

The first few days home from the hospital were pure bliss…and then I had a little complication fall into my lap (ha ha) that knocked me flat on my back for several days. And I did something I'd never, ever done before. I held our new baby nearly every second. She slept on my chest. I breathed her in. And she brought healing to a place in my heart I didn't know needed healing.

I was frustrated by the prospect of not being able to be up on my feet, caring for house and home (and was SO THANKFUL for my MIL!!). I complained to my mama and she kind of made me mad when she told me this complication was a gift from God and to enjoy the gift of being forced off my feet for a period of time. I didn't see it then. But I do now. I wouldn't trade those days of holding baby girl 24/7 for anything.

And those late night and early morning feedings…this go 'round, they were sweet. Priceless. Just…preciousness. I have treasured this season of motherhood like no other. I cannot believe it's taken me four births and a whole lotta heartache to come to a place of enjoying this phase and having a thankful heart.

Don't get me wrong…I totally have my days of tears and "I can't do this!" and "What have we done? We are crazy! I need to put the children in school - NOW!" And God is merciful and His grace, sufficient.

Four is keeping me on my knees. Daily I feel my temper about to spill over and I have to preach the Gospel…I cannot be patient. I cannot be gentle. I cannot answer this question for the umpteenth time without losing it. But Christ in me can be patient. And gentle. And can answer tenderly. 

And of course there are a lot of days (multiple times a day) when I do just lose it. And it's so ugly. And sometimes my heart's so hard it takes a while for the Holy Spirit to break through. 

I hope and pray that in these days of crazy…amidst my failures and shortness…that somehow God is glorified and my children see Jesus.

November was a sweet month…we made a trip home to say goodbye to my precious grandmother. (My dad's mom.) She'd been sick with dementia and then alzheimers for a number of years. It was precious to get to see her one last time. She wasn't aware of our presence, but it was good to hold her hand and lean in close and to whisper to her that I was holding her eleventh great-grandchild, who is also, in part, her namesake. And it was amazing to grieve with hope. 

I spent Monday nights with my grandparents during my freshman and sophomore years of high school…I will always treasure that time with them. That's when my grandmother and I had some deep conversations and that is when my love for her was cemented. And so it was an honor and joy to hold our baby girl close to Bongoo and to whisper those things in her ear…and again, to grieve with hope. 

My children blessed me incredibly during that time. They, too, held her hand and talked to her and were very comfortable. We spent a few minutes praying for her and they asked if when she died, would she see our babies in heaven. And that about undid me.

I've been humbled and amazed by how much our children adore our new baby. Like…they just LOVE her.

I've never, in all his six years, heard Little Man speak with such gentleness and affection.

Little Bit loves her…well…roughly. Thank goodness babies are resilient!

The pictures above and below are pretty accurate representations of what happens when the youngest two hang together. The thing is, Little Bit really loves her new sister…she's just rough. Really. Rough. 

With number four, I am doing everything I said I'd never do…she sleeps in a cradle in our bedroom! I haven't left her in the nursery during church or Sunday school...

I haven't wanted to move her up to her crib…because I feel pretty sure this will be the last season of having a baby and getting to spend this kind of snuggle time with a baby…at least until my girls have babies, Lord willing. 

And there was this little issue, about moving her up, that made me a tad nervous. We have, ahem, had, this pet spider…named Charlotte. She lived in the window in our guest room. Every night she would creep out from the opening where the rope and pulley are fastened. She kept a tiny web in the corner of the window and well, over the course of the last year and a half, we'd become quite fond of her. We think she was a southern house spider. So anyway…something about putting my helpless baby to bed in a room with a big ol' black spider - regardless of how fond we'd become of her and how non-threatening she's supposed to be, was unnerving. 

So we poisoned the spider. And I'm a little bit sad. I keep peeking in to see if just maybe she's been hiding. Alas, I haven't seen her and her web hasn't returned. 

And my MIL started peeling wallpaper…and what do you know!? Three months later and we have two rooms and one ceiling stripped of wallpaper, almost all the plaster repaired, and a good bit of the two rooms painted. 

One can barely navigate the hall upstairs. It's a total wreck and is currently housing a bed and lots of furniture! There are bits of wallpaper clinging to the steps. It's a mess. And the beat goes on.

Ok…now let's talk about Amazon Prime. Um. Hello. Do you know about this? 

Let's rewind about six or so months. I was grossly nauseated and pregnant. I dropped Sister at art and took the younger two with me to Lowes. All I needed was a filter for our fridge water dispenser. There were three employees in the appliance section…all helping one customer. I stood at the rack of filters, puzzled, trying to decipher their code while one child danced and cried about needing to potty. I couldn't figure out which filter I needed. We beelined for the bathroom…too late. The clock was ticking. I could't get any help. Art lessons were almost over. Still, I couldn't figure out which filter I needed. Finally two employees tried to help. They weren't sure either. I was done and called The Engineer - because he knows everything and can figure out whatever he doesn't know because he's a total genius. So while the Lowes employees kept looking, The Engineer figured it out and called me back with the right info. In the meantime, I arranged for someone else to pick up Sister from art. Finally I found the correct filter, sped to the front to pay, and rushed out the door to grab Sister…late. And I sweat when I'm under pressure like that. I was sweating. Put out. Annoyed. And the car smelled like urine. I was NOT a happy camper.

So when I learned water filters and a million other things, can be ordered on Amazon and for $70/year every prime item ships "free" and is at my door in two days…I was sold. It takes two days to pack up four kids anyway. And so we joined. I'm never leaving the house again. 

Now let's talk about hair loss. Because (insert sarcasm) I know it's important to share things like this on the www. This is the fifth pregnancy after which I have had significant hair loss. Each time it's gotten worse. I have lost pretty much all the long hair on one section of my head and have only short, one inch strands in its place. I'm now parting my hair on the opposite side. This is taking a LOT of getting used to. And my hair…it hurts. Seriously. The dermatologist says the follicles are swollen and the discomfort will go away eventually. 

I really, really miss my hair. 

Mama turned SIXTY in October! We surprised her with the best ever weekend get-away at a friend's lake house. 

My sweet Aunt made the fourteen hour trek to join us in celebrating Mama!

We returned to their old stomping grounds…saw the house they grew up in - their last name was STILL on the mailbox! It's been a mere fifty years! Not even kidding.

And then we escaped to the lake and lazed about and stayed up way too late and ate super well. I brought our newest and my baby sister brought her baby…it was a precious weekend celebrating Mama! (Love you, Mom!!!)

This little one rolled over a few nights ago!!! Say what!!!??? Stop it! This is happening too fast.

Let's touch on school. I've given up starting any earlier than nine. And so nine it is. Baby is four months old today. I seriously feel like I am just now getting my groove back. 

Yesterday morning, after The Engineer left, I sat on the floor and did some painting. Alone. In the quiet. It was dark outside. The children were all asleep. I listened to James White (check him out!) preach. And it was completely rejuvenating. 

During Thanksgiving week we spent time with those who'd not yet met our newest.

This included time with The Engineer's grands…our newest is also, in part, his paternal grandmother's namesake.

We are so blessed in that our children know both sets of his grandparents. 

Our time there was fun and quiet and relaxing.

And then we spent time with his maternal grandparents…and for whatever reason (I guess the distraction of four children during a much shorter visit?) I didn't pull out my big camera and don't have pictures of our time with them to share. (sad!)

Thanksgiving day was spent at Mama's…Little Man took out a turkey leg.

And bam, it's Christmas time!  I'm not sure when I'll be back on the ol' blog...

If not before Christmas, Merry Christmas to you and yours!!! xoxo

Oh Yeah...

Little Bit: "Why won't dis open?" (Referring to the now dry-wall where a sliding door had been.)

Me: "It doesn't open anymore. We took

out the sliding door and put in a wall."

Little Bit: "Why???"

Me: "So mommy and daddy can have some privacy and y'all can't bust in on us  anymore."

Little Bit: "Oh yeah...well we can still bust in on y'all through your bedroom door."

The Perfect Night

We've stripped, sanded, and are now priming 14 bi-fold doors and two regular size doors. 80 years of paint. 24 man hours times two. Adios peach bathroom

paint. Hello quiet night, crickets chirping, cold beverages and paintbrushes in hand. Alone time with the hubs. It's sweet. 

Yo...What UP!?

Aren't you excited to see the inside of our silverware drawer?! Our kitchen has four drawers. One extremely narrow. Two that are pretty narrow. And then the work horse of all drawers. The mother of all our drawers, if you will.

I had her jam packed...after rearranging kitchen drawers forty-eight times...and had finally figured out the best configuration. Only, there was so much more potential inside that drawer. Potential that just couldn't be realized with plastic, shallow silverware dividers.

I shared my ideas with The Engineer...who promptly brought in his measuring tape, graph paper, and pencil and we set to work...both of us spewing ideas, him sketching...

The next time I saw the drawer it looked like this. Get this, it's all easily removed. Like, comes out in one piece. I was floored. The man is amazing. AMAZING. The grooves...he hand sanded each one. It's perfect.

And then he painted and installed it...and now I've filled it and we are SO enjoying it! I love the contrasting colors. It feels like the space in that drawer is doubled. Everything has a home. It's awesome. The compartments are taller than the plastic dividers were, so more can be stacked in each compartment. I'm lovin' it. He's good, y'all.



While he worked on that, I took this baby out (on loan from friends) and pressure washed the house and sidewalk and driveway. Pressure washing is messy business. I decided I'd sport my running shorts and an old pink tank top. The Engineer okayed my clothing choice - which I'd NEVER wear in public. Our house is set back a decent bit from the street. I really thought I'd be fine...you know, far enough away that anyone passing by wouldn't really notice my, um, choice of clothing. In particular that top that was fitting a wee bit snug across my belly.

I was wrong.

I had two different neighbors (both men) drive up our driveway to visit. One came back a second time. I was slightly mortified. Lesson learned.

Anyway, the house and sidewalk, etc. look fantastic! I'm pleased with the results. And I had a blast knocking that stuff off the house. What instant progress...that's not quickly undone! (smile!)

Hands down this is my fav piece of art Sister produced this year. I'm in love. The bottom corner says, "I speak chic." That's so her. Every time I lay eyes on this fine work, I smile. BIG. (It's a self-portrait.)

And this...this was sort of one of those out of body experiences that occur every once in a while. This would be Little Man and his kindergarten class walking into their kindergarten graduation to "Pomp and Circumstance."

I mean...I feel like I'm about to offend a bunch of people. What's up with kindergarten graduation?

I kind of cringed during the whole thing...there were a handful of women weeping. Hicky-snot crying. Little Man nearly burst into tears when they sang their closing song...it was about leaving kindergarten and moving on...He was adorable. Precious. This was a really big deal to him.

I mean...I don't know. I was just happy kindergarten was over because it meant I'd have my baby back at home with me. No tears here. I'm thinking a program would be more than sufficient. The cap and gown seemed a bit much to me. Thoughts?

In closing, one of the ministers of the church affiliated with this particular school went on and on about how fortunate we are as parents to have had that school lay a foundation for our child's life...and now we could go forth and build upon the foundation they had laid. He went on to encourage us to begin getting involved in our child's life...to begin training him in the way he should go...it was offensive. I have friends who adore this program. I don't mean to step on toes. This just isn't our thing. We've been working since before this boy was born to build a foundation...with Christ as the cornerstone. We've prayed for this child long before conception. We've been involved. We are involved. Very involved. We've been training. We are training. And by the grace of God, He will redeem our mistakes and shortcomings and utter failures. We pray that his sins will find him out, that God will hold him close and that when he grows old, he will not depart from truth.

But - all that said, it meant The Engineer took the day off and we got to hang as a family and that was super fun! Celebrating Little Man and his year in kindergarten was special! We made a big deal of him...and he glowed.

The in-laws came in town for the weekend - again, super fun!

Sister, sweet Sister. You are getting so big! You are so thoughtful. So precious. My heart swells with love for you. You're a little bookworm, too.

And my Little Man. You are a dear. A fearless, wild and crazy little man.

It is such a sweet journey seeing the Lord work in their hearts and lives...every now and then I get a tiny glimpse of the fruit of our labors, of God's faithfulness...in their choices and actions. Oh, don't get me wrong, we totally don't have it together, I just mean I see fruit in their lives...little, tiny glimpses...just enough to encourage me... and it is good. (No worries, nothing like a throw-down, head turning, screaming tantrum in Target {by a three year old} to keep me humble!)

They love their grandfather.

LOVE this pic!

And this one, too.

Switching gears...Mother's Day 2013...HOME RUN!!! BEST EVER!!! The Engineer and the children gave me hydrangeas. One of my most favorite flowers EVER!!! My grandmother had two huge hydrangeas planted against the back of the boat house at the lake...I remember summer after summer of taking in the beauty of those blooms. And now every time I look out my kitchen window or the back door I smile. And every time I pull in...I grin. They are beautiful and they scream "LOVE" to me.

We have four days of school under our belts...so far I LOOOOVE having them all home. It's still pretty early, huh!? Sister loves the companionship. Little Man is flying through math. I'm wondering if we need to move up a level? Ahhh...the beauty of homeschooling. Little Bit is working the Sing, Spell, Read, & Write for 4-P...her words every morning, "dis is boring." Oh well.

I'm reading Managers of Their Homes...recommended by a sweet new friend. The book is challenging me. I've never and I mean never scheduled every thirty minutes of my day. I'm not sure I can survive doing life like that. But, the authors are quick to pour in grace...the schedule is there to help you, to serve you...not to make you a slave. So anyway, I'm going to implement a schedule for us (maybe not every thirty minutes)...we need one. I don't think I can teach two children and not have some type of schedule in place...we'll figure it out. (smile)

That's one convincing black eye, eh? The children had me for a split second. That's a lot of eye shadow...

We've taken down every door in our bathroom...that would be 14 bi-fold doors...and have nearly stripped and sanded every one of them. (And yes, we were in a very well ventilated space and I wore gloves, glasses, and a mask!) That peach paint is going. Soon. The Engineer and I both dread sanding down all the trim and walls. Peach latex right on top of "institutional green"(The Engineer's name for it) oil based paint...so it's already peeling pretty bad. Nice.

It's been fun working on these projects together. You get to do a lot of talking when you strip 14 bi-fold doors. (And - oh gross! The roach eggs on the back of some of them. Eek!!! Gross me out!-They're all old...remember, I love some Demon WP!) So anyway, it's been hard work, but a lot of fun. I'm so thankful for The Engineer.

Oh...we have our homestudy in hand and have begun putting together our dossier! Woop woop! Basically, we are in an intense "paper work" stage. Lots to gather. Lots to have certified. And somehow we missed that we needed our passports as part of our dossier...so we have a bit of a hold up there. I was frustrated at first, and then was reminded that it is all in the Lord's timing. He has already orchestrated the precious one He has for our family. I am trying really hard to drink deeply of these last few weeks of just the five of us...and yet I can barely wait for it to be the six of us and a little while after that, the seven of us!!! Yay!

Changing gears entirely. My heart is so heavy for our dear friends who are walking through profound loss. Watching them...reading their words as they flesh out their faith...standing firm on the truths in scripture...clinging to Jesus...preaching the Gospel to themselves and everyone they are in contact with...it is amazing. In the midst of deep, deep loss and heartbreak, their eyes are fixed on Jesus. They make me want to love Him more. If you are so inclined, read her most recent blog post, and be spurred on to love Jesus more. And please, pray for them. And if you don't know the Lord, I pray that this family's story might be used to draw you to Him. He is radiating from their lives, from their brokenness and pain like a BRIGHT ray of sunshine. It is only because of Christ that we have hope. To God be the glory.