Knitting Peanut Roaster

Seriously, are you believing this????

I'm not even sure how to sum up what's been happening in our home...in our hearts. Almost two weeks ago the children were playing at our neighbor's house. Little Bit and her friend were snoozing. The house was quiet. I tried to ignore the thought. To quiet my heart. Finally I caved. I'd promised myself I wouldn't take another unless I knew. I didn't know. But I had to. I couldn't shake the feeling.

And it was immediately obvious. And I was shocked. And I laughed and I cried. All at the same time. In a fluttering panic, I opted to place it in a folded piece of paper, upon which I wrote the due date and a verse that holds a special place in our hearts.

I tucked the envelope into the mail and hoped The Engineer wouldn't notice the missing stamp and postmark. As you saw, he didn't!

I've shared bits of my heart here and here. Over the course of the last two months, the Lord has really worked in my heart, in our hearts. He finally brought me to that place where, though I longed for more children, and though I could not fathom how not having another child would be better than having another child, I wanted His will more than my own. That's not the result of anything in me. That is totally, completely, one hundred percent the work of the Spirit in my heart, in our hearts. I believed with all my heart that He had closed that door. And I had been able to praise Him and thank Him for His will, even when it wasn't what we wanted. Again - that was nothing in me, that was all because of and through the Holy Spirit.

And so by His grace I've been more relaxed about this whole longing, finally trusting. Knowing. Resting in the fact that He really is the One who gives life, despite seventeen long and hard months of our best efforts.

And He has given life.

And we are rejoicing and grinning. We keep looking at one another and saying, "Did you know we're going to have another baby?" We keep emailing and calling one another just to say, "Did you know we're going to have another baby?" 

I really believed in my heart that this wasn't going to be His will. Oh, how He has burst forth the floodgates. His blessings are pouring into our lives and we are overwhelmed in so many ways.

To God be the glory, great things He has done!

Telling the children was super fun. We set a place at the sixth chair around our table, the one that sits empty and reminds us to pray for another baby, only we set it with a porridger and baby spoon and we even pulled out the high chair. Sister was the first to notice. I played it cool. In a few seconds she knew and I could see it on her face and she burst into tears and buried her face in my stomach. I asked her what was wrong and she said, "Oh Mama! I am just so happy!"

Little Man was thrilled as well. He was more concerned with how big my stomach will get and with how big it would get if we had three at once and then, "Mama, what if you had fifty-five babies at one time? That would be AWESOME!!!"

Little Bit is clueless. 

And we all immediately talked about Who knits babies together and Who gives life and as a family, we gave Him thanks.

We were filming their reaction and sadly the camera cut off before the children even came to the dinner table. We missed the entire thing. We reenacted the scene, but it just wasn't quite the same.

And so, friends, I thank you for your prayers for our family. Thank you for your kind calls, emails, texts, and comments. Thank you for lifting us up to our heavenly Father. Thank you for being a safe place to share my heart. You have been nothing but supportive and encouraging and I thank you. We thank you. 

I believe Sister pulling for a girl. She wrote, "God gave me a baby and I love it. I love my baby sis. She is pretty and nice."

After going through a miscarriage and a tubal pregnancy, my doctor is watching us closely. They've done two rounds of blood work and it has all come back looking great. I had an ultra sound Friday and they were able to confirm that baby is where he's supposed to be! Yea! Praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Regardless of all the tests and statistics, we know Who is knitting this little one together. This little one our little ones have affectionately named "Peanut Roaster." God is sovereign and He is good, no matter what.

And I want to say - to my friends who are still struggling with this, whose hearts are aching and longing for a child - because many of you have shared your hurt with me - my heart aches with and for you. I don't want to gloss over this. I am thinking about you. I am sure for many, reading this post brings tears and a sting to your heart because it hurts because you want this, too. And many of you have wanted this for a very, very long time. I am praying for you. Specifically, for you. And the Lord knows who you are. You are loved and you are precious. Take heart. The Lord knows your heart. He knows your longing. I pray He will work His perfect plan in your life and give you peace and contentment and even joy. And if we were face to face, I would cry with you and pray with and for you. Dear friend, you are precious to the Lord. Take heart. I pray His comfort and peace upon your life.

Ziggurats, Swings, Sand, & Tents...Life

Okay, here are the kids posing beside the ziggurat they built a for school a few weeks ago. Quite exciting! Only, I didn't have enough brown paint on hand, so I added cinnamon (the dollar store kind) to try and darken the paint...which gave the ziggurat a stomach flipping odor. Something about paint, cinnamon, grits, and dirt all together that was rather unpleasant! Regardless, it graced our table for a solid week.

Our curriculum has had us studying Mesopotamia. We've also been learning some art terms and studying ancient Mesopotamian art. 

Pulling out my college art history book and having my children pour over it's pages, fascinated, grinning, pointing, firing off questions...well, it's made me so happy!

And while there are really precious and wonderful moments - the "ah-hahs" of teaching and the tenderness of God teaching us, changing us, working in our lives, there are also hard and long days.

Little Man was with a friend for the afternoon. Little Bit was napping. I told Sister she needed to "rest" so I could have an hour without interruptions. Ha. My attitude was rotten. And then my friend ripped the scales from my eyes and said something profound..."go for the eternal. In the midst of the noodles, go for the eternal. You'll never regret it." By God's grace, I am trying. Trying to go for the eternal. Rugs come and go. Accidents happen. My daughter is eternal.

Fun times!

The Engineer and I took a little adventure a few weekends ago. We got to help chaperone the youth in our church on a white water rafting trip! The grands graciously kept the children!

We pulled out a little before six. Most of our van was asleep before we made it outside the city limits.

The Engineer was driving a 15 passenger van...it was a little surreal.

We did more than just raft...we also did a high ropes course.

Part of that course included a swing...

That was crazy high...

And required a full body harness...

And my crazy husband impressed us all by soaring through the air, arms spread wide! NO fear.

Once hooked in, a team (of around 10 kids) pulled you up...

I think I remember hearing it was 40 feet high.

Y'all, that is really high!

Once you were at the top, you had to pull your own release...

If you're me, on the way up you think, "what if these cables break? I might die. I mean, I would die if they break. And they might. And I would die."

And then you pull the release and you SCREAM with everything you have in you!

And then you remember your husband's awesome example and you think, "If I'm going to die, I might as well die having fun. Hanging on to a falling cable isn't going to save me." (Morbid, I know.)

And you throw your arms wide and you know what? It was SO. MUCH. FUN!!!

And we rafted. And that rocked. And we played lots of games requiring massive amounts of running. I cannot out run high school athletes. Period. Hopeless. And in one game I was being chased by a crazy soccer player athlete and I knew outrunning her was hopeless, so I thought I'd turn abruptly and dive past her. That was a dumb decision. I NAILED my head. I fought the tears. My head throbbed. After an hour, I gladly accepted a packet of Goodies Headache Powder. That stuff is awesome. A few minutes later...GAME ON. Bring it. I still got nailed. Again. And again. And again. I'm so not a teenager anymore.

And then we drove home. The scenery was beautiful. We had so much fun. Those kids are awesome. 

What is love? Love is when some of your closest friends, who happen to be your neighbors, call you one Saturday morning and say, "We want to do something really special for y'all. We want to give you two nights in a brand new hotel at Orange Beach. And, we want to keep your kids while you're away." 

We were speechless. And elated. Who does that? Who gives someone two nights in a brand new hotel on the beach? AND offers to keep their children? To say we were touched would be a tremendous understatement. 

The anticipation and excitement was so much fun.

We ate at some fabulous restaurants. We splurged and rented chairs down on the beach. You know, the ones where the guy comes by and offers to move your umbrella for you. (He also nailed me in the head with said umbrella while wiggling it into the sand. We laughed.)

Our room had a balcony and chairs. We sat outside both nights. The weather couldn't have been more perfect. We walked and walked and walked. We held hands. We talked. Uninterrupted. It was so good to have that time away. With nothing to do, but be. It's been several years since we've gotten away to just be. I hadn't realized how badly we need that.

Thank you, sweet friends. Words don't express our gratitude. 

This little munchkin was VERY happy to see us leave and VERY UNHAPPY to see us return. (Think screaming fit, kicking legs, reaching for the neighbors...and every time we've set foot outside since, she calls for them...)  Little Man told us they prefer our friends to us because, "They're so much nicer." Ha. Sorry kid. Life's tough.

The Engineer helped me organize and plan our homeschool week. As he flipped through the curriculum he read a suggestion to let your children sleep in a tent all week - sort of like what Abraham and Sarah would have done...sort of. I would have skipped over that. But not The Engineer.

He bought a bag of air heads, set that tent up, carried all the sleeping bags out, told the kids to load up on books, slapped on his head lamp, ran a power cord to the tent, plugged in his alarm clock, brought the dogs in the tent, zipped it up and I didn't hear from them until a little after five this morning. 

This picture cracks me up. 

This one does too. Sister is in The Engineer's lap.

I've been archiving pictures and ran across these. Sister and I went to a 50th wedding anniversary celebration and I told her to dress in her Sunday best.

I nearly died when she came down in those boots. And then I swallowed my pride and rolled with it.

I'm so glad I did. A french hand-sewn dress and camo cow-girl boots. She rocked it. 

Happy Wednesday, y'all!

Snip Snip

While we were playing outside a few days ago, I let this little one dig in the dirt...and get super dusty dirty. 

We don't really have grass in our backyard (thanks, Warrior!). It's more like a giant dust pit.

She took her "doots" (boots) off and dug her sock feet into the dust. There's still a little on her face.

She had a really fun time. 

And when we came inside, a dose of inspiration and courage hit me...

I gave the camera to Sister. She captured all of this! (And I'm so thankful. She did awesome!)

I was a little concerned with how the hair cut would turn out...

Her hair is very fine and straight.

A snack always helps!

She was really excited.

I think she felt super grown up. She kept grinning and pulling her shoulders up.

Ta-da!

Preciousness, I'd say.

A smile and "about time" was The Engineer's response.

If you talk to Little Bit, she'll probably grab a section of her hair to show you.

And just to keep it real, I thought I'd show you our master bathroom - where the hair cut took place.

Seven years. That's how long we've lived with it like this. This Christmas will make eight.

For a while we had our family picture with Dave taped where a mirror should be - as inspiration and a reminder why it's ok, even good, to live with our bathroom looking like this.

The walls will have to be re-sheet rocked. They were in pretty bad shape. The Engineer hit the window with the ladder in the middle of the night shortly after we'd moved in - he was trying to stop a roof leak - and bam! Broken glass...hence the duct tape. And well, it is what it is. And I'm okay with that. One day...one day.

Happy weekend, y'all!